It held my soul up to a candle It burned for half as long and bright The questions asked of circumstance are known Even though it’s a hole unbecoming of light I’m replaying all the grievances Past and present I perceive All the tender time and asinine beliefs that I receive without latency Through the doorway of forgiveness I’m watching all my loved ones leave In the disarray, I sit and stay and wait for searching doors to close on me Is this the semblance of denial Of the distance and the lore I take it back, and reenact acceptance of the years I’m walking towards

Hand me down a hereditary house; That’s made with instability and built upon the doubt Of a mother and father, lighting gas into the lungs Burning out the furnace of their last born son They hid their courage in the panic rooms I’m locking every door I’m walking through And I’m scared and unprepared to leave behind the signs of what was never there And I laid you on the floor Gave you more of the reasons to conjure and withhold a single soul for three seasons Kissing on the ceiling Here’s the meaning of the floral designs on the wall of my mind The wall of my mind We held it up to the candle of our love And the fever dreams between us that we placed ourselves above It’s burning twice as bright as you and I And in the darkest rooms it starts to shine Apropos of what I know I’m unlocking doors within the candleglow And I laid you on the floor Gave you more of the reasons to conjure and withhold a single soul for three seasons Kissing on the ceiling Here’s the meaning of the floral designs on the wall of my mind The wall of my mind And I laid you on the floor Gave you more of the reasons to conjure and withhold a single soul for three seasons Kissing on the ceiling Here’s the meaning of the floral designs on the wall of my mind The wall of my mind

Rehearsing all the hearsing routes, Prepared for the worst though it’s happened now Didn’t know how to say That your mass exodus just looked like exudate Didn’t really need to hear your voice, I just need to know that you’re okay Pledge allegiance to your favorite songs in the hopes that you’re still singing along We wear our black and white suits, We look like magpies mourning in the afternoon Pulling teeth from the pulpit, Extracting your wisdom, I just didn’t know it Laid you down in the garden, Dug a hole in your sternum to sleep where your heart is Didn’t really need to hear your voice, I just need to know that you’re okay Pledge allegiance to your favorite songs in the hopes that you’re still singing along You’re still singing along (And I sit here alone, and far from you. And it is night, and I am reflecting on everything, all around me, and I am thinking of you) I heard a little bird in your neck of the woods I saw a cardinal giving back to this Earth I heard a little bird in your neck of the woods I saw a cardinal giving back to this Earth We talk about the afterlife like we were there last night (In your neck of the woods) Anxiety still holds us to its knife (Giving back to this earth) I heard a little bird in your neck of the woods I saw a cardinal giving back to this Earth

And I heard you say that nothing good ever wants to go your way So you take back the suicide pact and ink it on your skin You never really knew how much you meant And you heard me say that you never really learned what you left that day Holding back on panic attacks, and leaving out your name Ensuring all obituaries blank Oh the swell of the Earth Opened its mouth and swallowed you first With skin on your bones, you're coming home Your bike's out on the lawn Passed out on the porch by early dawn All the frays in the quilt Unraveled all the ends of our sleepless guilt Of all our friends that played pretend, you always laughed the most One of many signs I should've known You will guide the long ships away from all the shallows You will be the lost light traced upon our shadows Now you're laying waste to all the different ways that you've shown your grace From trick or treats to small defeats We felt your loss the most Blanket shells without your inner ghost And the cold kept you still, while you let your snowfall memories write out your will Like blinking lights on Christmas night, your neurons LED the screen Your nothingness meant everything to me Now on New Years Eve, as lovers kiss each other as they count down from three You would tesselate at the backyard gate, your soul is going - gone We lost you long before you had moved on Then you jumped from the edge of a different impermanence by the water's ledge Your lungs filled with your family's love We're drowning by the pier, in the ocean of your mother's tears You will guide the long ships away from all the shallows You will be the lost light traced upon our shadows Woah-oh-oh Woah-oh-oh You will guide the long ships away from all the shallows You will be the lost light traced upon our shadows You will guide the long ships away from all the shallows You will be the lost light traced upon our shadows And I heard you say (You will guide the long ships away from all the shallows) That nothing good ever wants to go your way (You will be the lost light traced upon our shadows) So you take back the suicide pact and ink it on your skin (You will guide the long ships away from all the shallows) You never really knew how much you meant (You will be the lost light traced upon our shadows) And you heard me say (You will guide the long ships away from all the shallows) That you never really learned what you left that day (You will be the lost light traced upon our shadows) Holding back on panic attacks, and leaving out your name (You will guide the long ships away from all the shallows) Ensuring all obituaries blank (You will be the lost light traced upon our shadows)

There’s a moral that’s been clinging to the back of your neck The houndings are confounding from the base of your bed If the universe ain’t punishing, at least I’ve learned it’s rushing me The opposite is evident however you said Walking your descendants through the lanes of the past You call it how you see it, I’m a pain in the ass Honesty is honestly the best way that you promised me That time is just a function when you’re not coming back It’s devolving into something that I can’t control It revolves around the people that I’ve always known I’m wanting back the former soul but the portal ain’t sustainable It’s closing on the tangents of not letting go Wrapped within the laughing at the end of your breath Disbelieving you’re receiving thoughts I never expressed So I take it back and reenact acceptance of the time we had Resigning to the findings of the speed that you left Said you’d never lead me away from the truth And how it flows back from me to you The timelines are ending, I’m always resenting How one day I’ll be okay Said you’d never lead me away from the truth And how it flows back from me to you The door is ajar, and it’s not too far Through is the only way Through is the only way